Monday, October 09, 2006

The Turrarists Got the Nuke-ya-lers!

BabyOwls has obtained the official transcript of an interview between Katie Couric and President George W. Bush which is set to air tomorrow night on whatever network it is she works for now.

Katie: Mr. President, what are your thoughts on the nuclear testing which took place today in North Korea?
Bush: The world community cannot tolerate this obvious act of nuke-ya-ler agression. The United Nations must stand up to Pyongyang and North Kurr-rea and say, "We will not tolerate turrarism."
Katie: So you consider this an act of terrorism Mr. President?
Bush: Absolutely Katie, North Kurr-rea was told to halt their nuke-ya-ler program. They went right on ahead and held nuke-ya-ler trials. We have reason to believe they want to use these nuke-ya-ler capabilities for turrarist activities. This is turrarism at its most turrible.
Katie: North Korea drew world criticism several months ago when they test fired a nuclear weapon into the ocean. Do you feel more strongly opposed to this test which took place on dry land?
Bush: Not really Katie. Unauthorized nuke-ya-ler testing is unauthorized nuke-ya-ler testing whether takes place over the ocean or on turra firma. Nuke-ya-ler turrarism is unacceptable over North Kurr-rea's turritorial waters or any of North Kur-rea's turritories.
Katie: Mr. President, members of the North Korean government have defended the testing by saying that Nuclear energy would do alot to ease the North Korean Financial crisis. How else would you suggest North Korea raise desperately needed funds - tourism?
Bush: Well, obviously turism isn't the answer. You can't have turism when there's turrarism, that would be turrible. If North Korea were to cut out all nuke-ya-ler and turrarist activity, then I think turrism would be turrific.
Katie: Well, we thank you for your time Mr. President. Just to close off on a lighter note, I hear that Mrs. Bush is making some additions to the Rose Garden.
Bush: She's not really adding as much as she is refurbishing. All of the old turra cotta looked turrible, so she's having that cleaned up and she's considering adding a display of turrariums on the turrace.
Katie: Thank you Mr. President
Bush: Thank Katie and G-d Bless this Turrific Country of Ours!


JR's Thumbprints said...

I'll have to call my travel agent and cancel my trip to North Korea. I wouldn't want anyone suspecting me of participating in their nuclear testing.

mist1 said...

So far, Katie and Meredith have been interchangeable for me. I would like to see them host Deal or No Deal though.

Anonymous said...

Guess we can all be glad Dick Cheney isn't a North Korean. Can you imagine Dick with a nuclear weapon?

Erik Donald France said...

Yup, imagine someone so silly as G.W. with his stubborn use of language and basic lack of understanding beeing in charge of our collective destiny! Oops -- I guess he is. And that man named Kim. God help us all ;) Elvis Costello for U.N. ambassador!

Tai said...'s turrIFic!

And hey, thanks for stopping by my blog...come back soon!
I've bookmarked yours :)

Anonymous said...

Thanks for the insight. How did we know Katie would end on a light note? ;-)

At least she did according to your transcript ;-)

Jacob said...

Ah, but the real hard hitters want to know: does Katie get Dubbya to sit on the desk with her at the end? "Isn't she the cutest thang?"